I was sexually assaulted by my brother as a child and I have so much disturbing sexual fantasies

When I was a child my older brother sexually assaulted me. Almost a decade has passed and I am still tormented by this. I still live with him and see him everyday. I didn’t know it was SA and only realized when i was about 13. I told my entire family and they pretend it didn’t happen. My parents beg me to talk to him and get upset that i’m not on speaking terms with him so I always feel like it’s my fault that I can’t forgive him. When I told my mom for the first time, she was so devastated and my brother cried and apologized to her but not to me. Now nobody brings up the fact that he SA’d me. It feels like nobody cares that he did that to me and ruined my life. Now I get so turned on by incest or the idea of someone being SA’d and I know that it is wrong but I can’t control it. What is wrong with me?