Jennette and Sam

I am a 1995 baby and grew up watching iCarly. I always loved Sam, Carly and Freddie and it felt like a show I could relate to at the time because I was around the same ages as they were. I had a massive crush on Freddie, I thought Carly was pretty and of course thought Spencer and Gibby were hilarious but my favorite character by far was Sam. I loved her hilarious stabs at Freddie and Gibby, her kind but funny gestures of friendship toward Carly and of course her butter sock. When I saw that Jennette had written a book, I flew to the shelves. I read it in a day and a half and I loved it but it also broke my heart. I couldn’t believe it. Not only was the abuse shocking to read about but I found myself feeling almost…heartbroken at the fact that she didn’t enjoy being Sam or even being on the show. It was selfish, I know. I kept thinking while reading the book that she must love playing Sam and relate to her given the things she had gone through and being that her character also had a rough upbringing and a broken relationship with her mother but when I got further into the book and realized that, I was shocked. How can you not love the character that seemed so similar to you? I even read she isn’t similar to “Sam” at all and is actually very quiet and not at all outspoken like Sam. I guess what pushed her away from any love of the show or her character was the terrible abuse she endured. I mean, can you imagine going to throw up food you were forced to eat on set so you didn’t upset your mother? I imagine the role is tied to a lot of pain and uncomfortable memories but man, if that doesn’t show what a phenomenal actress she was, I don’t know what would. All that rambling to say, does anyone else feel a little sad that she doesn’t feel connected to the character of Sam Puckett? She is such a strong woman and just overall a bad ass human. I’m so glad she’s healing.