I need some perspective.

So I'm a 28M, 4'11 tall. I used to be on the short subreddit a few years ago but realised that it is toxic. I decided to take matters into my own hand and quit the self pity.

I got a good job in software engineering, got fit, talked to people a lot and got into therapy for my ocd. My therapy was in it's ending stages when my therapist suggested I should start dating now.

I had talked to some women in these years but hadn't really put much effort into it. I knew going into dating that I would face a good number of rejections based on my height but my logic was that there will be women who don't care, even if they're the minority I just need to find one. I was ready to be rejected.

So I made a profile on an app. Listed my height as 5'0 because it sounds a lot better than 4'11 and is visually indistinguishable. The first girl I matched talked for a week and then asked if the height I have listed is true? Unmatched stating that she's dating to marry. It didn't affect me a lot. I was ready for this.

I matched with another girl. Told her during the initial stages of talking to have a look at my height in my profile, so that she doesn't notice it after a week. She was 5'8. We talked for a week or so, I really liked her. But yesterday she told me that the height is going to be an issue for her. What really hurt was that she told me, usually she doesn't care about appearances if she really likes someone, and that we are really compatible but she can't see herself being with someone as short as me.

My whole premise of putting myself out there was that despite a majority of rejections there will be women who don't care about appearances but it turns out that I'm too short for women who don't care about appearances too. I don't know why but this one really hurt me.

I feel lost, hurt and really hopeless. I am getting negative feelings about women, feelings of hate. I don't want to become an incel, or have all these negative feelings but I feel betrayed to be judged on something I had no control over. I understand that people can't control who or what they are attracted to but I am not able to rationalize my feelings.

How do I go on? Should I even be putting myself out there if it's going to hurt so much?