I still only see one way out.
Being mild/moderate was hard enough, but being severe and bedbound has taken away my hope and ability to see any real future. I'm literally just fighting to make it through the each minute of every hour of every day. The only ray of hope comes when I briefly think about a possible cure and that I'll be normal again.
But let’s be real.
Two reasons I made it this far:
- I don't know what happens in the afterlife.
- I don't want to leave my Mom behind.
However, I still don't see any other way out of this nightmare. Every day is misery and torture, which is no way to live. The world has failed us. I'm middle-aged living with my parents. No health. No job. No partner. No joy. This is all so fucked up and people still don't understand. At least I won't be leaving behind any kids or any debt. I have written the farewells, and left my passwords and access to my accounts and assets for my family. This isn't some rash decision or crisis mode, it is something I've thought about for quite awhile now.
I'm sorry that I keep making posts like this, but I don't see any other way. You are all good people and I hope you all get the relief and life you deserve one day.