Conspiracy Theory: The Climbing Industry Hates People with Big Heads

I've got a Jupiter-sized melon. 63 cm helmets fit me comfortably without a beanie underneath, but if I want to keep my ears warm, my gargantuan noggin needs something bigger.

As far as I can tell, there exist two certified climbing helmets for those of us with especially girthy domes: The Kong Mouse (64 cm) and the Smith Summit MIPS (67 cm).

The former is a hard shell with no foam. If I trip and bounce my forehead off a talus pile, then all the money I paid for that criminology degree is wasted. The latter is a ski helmet cosplaying as a climbing helmet, so I can't wear it while still impressing the dudes at r/ClimbingCircleJerk.

This wasn't always the case. There used to be 64 cm and 65 cm helmets from Grivel, Trango, and Edelrid. No more. The industry has circled the wagons. So I ask you, my macrocephalic brothers, what are we to do?