Was I in the wrong for humiliating a student?
I (29F) am a middle school English teacher, and this is my first year in the role. Yesterday, one of my students, "Emily," had a complete breakdown during my class.
It was a day just like any other. Emily entered the classroom, and I immediately sensed that something was wrong with her. Her eyes were puffed up, as if she had been crying, and she kept hanging her head. Before class began, I had the chance to quietly ask her if she was allright. She nodded and replied, "I'm fine." Not wanting to push her, I let it go and started teaching.
About halfway through the lesson, I gave the class some practice problems where I could walk around and check their work. As I mademy way to Emily's desk, I noticed that she hadn't written anything down. Her pencil was just sitting there, untouched, and her hands were shaking. I leaned down and quietly asked if she needed help.
That was it. Emily shook her head and muttered, "I just can't do this anymore." Before I could say anything, she erupted into loud, uncontrollable sobs. The whole class was shocked, staring at her inutter silence.
I quickly led Emily into the hallway for space and privacy. I reassured her it was okay to feel overwhelmed and that she didn't need to explain anything she wasn't ready to talk about. After having a little chat, she wasn't appearing to calm down, so I decided to call the school counselor because I felt this was beyond my ability to handle at the time.
When the counselor came, Emily was very reluctant to go with her but ultimately did. I returned to class, but the energy had become tense. Some of the kids were whispering and I reminded them that they needed to be respectful and simply work. The rest of the period felt heavy, as everyone was visibly shaken, including me.
Later that afternoon, I spoke to the counselor. She told me Emily was having a mental breakdown and perhaps felt it was better if she tookthe rest of the week off. She said she would follow it up with Emily's parents and make sure she got the necessary help.
Today, I got an email from Emily's mom, and let me tell you, it was scathing. She said I "humiliated" her daughter in front of her peers and that I had no right to call the counselor in without her permission. Of course, she went ahead and made the following statements:
"Teachers these days are so quick to label every little thing as a mental health issue.""Maybe if you'd let her stay in class, she wouldn't have felt so embarrassed.""She doesn't need a break from school-this generation is becoming so weak. It wasn't a big deal."
I reacted accordingly, saying that I did it out of concern for the well-being of Emily, and my aim was not other than her getting assistance. I also said that I kept it as discreet as possible given the circumstances.
My principal has been understanding, and very supportive; he assured me I called it right. However, a few colleagues suggested that I mighthave unnecessarily escalated the situation, adding that I could have let Emily stay in class until she had calmed down.
Now I am second-guessing everything. Did I overreact? Should I have kept Emily in the classroom and handled it differently? I feel terriblethat this has made Emily's mom mad, but at the time I really felt like I was doing what was best for her. Should I have done somethingdifferently?