Emergency

hello! I am an 18 year old female. I was born in tbilisi, in a russian-speaking family, and got into a russian sector in school, which resulted in my isolation and nearly total lack of knowledge of georgian language.

unlike my parents, I have liberal views and probably am a lesbian. I made a mistake and confessed this to my mother. every now and then we fight, but I don't know how to move out since I can't get a job due to me not speaking georgian properly.

after recent argument, I've been having severe suicidal thoughts to the point where I genuinely felt like I'm going to commit very soon. I have zero friends in real life, but I do have childhood internet friends who live in russia, one of them(a girl) is willing to help me move and shelter me for the time being.

I don't know how to feel, hopeful or anxious. is it worth it? should I move to another country or should I somehow find a job and live here? please, give me an advice