Give me your spiciest!

So I have serious chronic pain issues and other chronic health stuff. I’m having a bad flare up and am stuck in bed. There are studies that say that just being aroused, not even coming, helps with chronic pain, anxiety and depression, and I’ve found it to be true. I’ve been going through several authors full works, but what I need is some super spicy, very graphic, books. I’ll take anything: bdsm, fantasy, dark, enemies to lovers, modern, historical. Give me something weird and questionable. I like passion but also want a level of intimacy. What got you going? Preferably KU, but if it’s a really good book series and highly recommend, that works too. Give it to me!