What helped you finally realize, damn this happened to me & it was very serious??

I just have so much dissociation, I....don't feel like what happened to me was bad?

My therapist literally said today "what happened to you was horrendous."

Those words stuck with me, because it does NOT feel like it was horrendous. It just feels...normal?

I have so much trouble feeling connected to this event, and truly feeling how bad it was, I have no emotional connection at all, no matter how hard I try.

What helped you finally snap out of it and truly realize, holy shit it WAS that bad?